are you still at the devil's house?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
