My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize