I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
