I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
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