how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
