hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
do herpes really smell.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
