Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Randomize
