That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
