She said her name was "party"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
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I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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