Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize