All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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