PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize