She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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