I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I lost the right to judge tonight
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize