A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Randomize
