Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
