pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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