i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
