this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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