I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
