it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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