Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize