Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize