Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
