Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize