It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
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He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
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When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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