There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
