If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
