ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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