Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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