i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
