now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
