Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
