Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
