I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
