well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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