do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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