Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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