I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
