I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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