I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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