I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
