i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
