Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
where am i from again
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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