Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
