Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize