Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize