Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize