My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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