Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
