Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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