Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
